"No man is free if he fears death, but the minute you conquer the fear of death, at that moment you are free...I submit to you that if a man hasn't discovered something that he will die for, he isn't fit to live."

At 17, Cassie Bernall had found something she would die for. And for the two years prior to her death she had lived an exemplary life of belonging, learning and contributing with her friends, family and community. Prior to that, well, that is where active parenting comes in. (And I mean little "a" and little "p," because her parents never had the advantage of a formal Active Parenting program.)

Cassie Bernall had once been a troubled teenager on much the same mistaken path as her killers. From fifth grade on she had been going downhill, becoming more and more hostile and depressed. By the time she was 14 she was using drugs, dabbling in witchcraft and cutting her arms.

It was then that her mother, Misty, found some letters written to Cassie by a friend. Using her good judgment Misty went ahead and violated her daughter's privacy--and read the letters. What she read shocked her so much that she was prompted to call her husband and then the sheriff.

As Misty describes in her new book She Said Yes: The Unlikely Martyrdom of Cassie Bernall, the next four months were an object lesson in actively parenting a teen on the brink of being out of control. Combining strong limit-setting with even stronger faith in and love for their daughter, the Bernalls were able to get Cassie headed down a better path--despite her powerful resistance. Some people will point to the weekend church retreat that prompted Cassie's religious conversion experience as the turning point. Maybe it was. But I think the preceding months of sacrifice and diligent parenting set the stage for that experience.

One of the remarkable aspects of She Said Yes is that it is many stories in one:
• As a parent educator, I find that it is first a story of remarkable parenting by the Bernalls.
• To my wife and to the Christian community at large it is a testament to the power of faith.
• To counselors it is also a story about the gut-wrenching loss of a child and how people can find meaning and begin healing from even profound loss.
• For teens it is a story about one of their own, a teen who chose to change her life for the better, and to admit her mistakes and weaknesses. It is about the power of choice and the courage of one's convictions.
• For all of us it is a wake-up call to the stresses of modern adolescence and the need to make our schools safer.

Active Parenting is honored to have been awarded the exclusive rights to make an educational video and discussion program based on Misty Bernall's captivating story. I am writing the Discussion Guides and will be working with Golden Apple Award winner Kathy Vander. We will create a documentary video that inspires parents, teachers, teens and others to make Cassie's death a meaningful focus for positive change.

Cassie's newfound devotion to God makes her story a natural for religious audiences, but her story has great meaning for non-religious audiences as well. Active Parenting's video--which includes interviews with Cassie's family, friends, and others influential in her life--will present Cassie's transformation in a way that is suitable for public schools and other secular settings.

You will be able to "personalize" your She Said Yes presentation with the accompanying discussion guides. The standard (secular) Discussion Guide is divided into three sections, one each for leading a parenting group, a youth group, and a teacher/youth leader in-service. The Discussion Guide for Faith Communities is divided into three similar sections, but with an emphasis on the Christian aspect of Cassie's story. When you order She Said Yes: The Unlikely Martyrdom of Cassie Bernall video, you will be able to choose the discussion guide that best suits your needs.